How to not enjoy the rain.

Wake up. Smell the rain. Sit up for a minute and stare out the window. 

Breath in. 

Breath out. 

Fail to receive that little jump the heart does normally when the weather is like this.

Get ready for the day. Feel like its way too cold outside to even be out of bed. 

Stare out the window. Sit there for a while. Sit there for way too long. Don't feel anything though. Just watch the rain fall down and the earth shiver. Stare at the grass that you've once danced on and rolled in and watched the clouds go by on. Its now cold and wet. In a short amount of time, it will be covered in snow once again. Feel a strange attachment towards it. Wish you could go out and lay in the sun for just a little longer. But the sun is not there. Close your eyes.

Be late. When your late, you tend to hurry. Hurrying makes things less enjoyable. 

Run out to the car in a skirt and heels. Curse the cold wind as it blows your skirt up and makes you flash the car passing by.

Be completely angry and cold. Take comfort in the fact that someone you love will be where you are going. 

Arrive 15 minutes late. Rush in to the bathroom before reaching your class to fix your hair and make sure your not showing too much skin. 

Sit in class next to a girl you hardly know. Pretend to pay attention. Wait till everyone stands to go, then stand and walk to the next class. 

Talk to friends. Feel apathetic.

Your just to tired to deal with it. 

Walk by the door. Look outside. Hate the cold.

When you reach the next class your friend will leave. Luckily you have someone you love with you. 

Hold his hand. Sit close to him.

Sit with him after everything is over. Feel a little empty.

Walk with him to his car. Watch him turn on the heat as you sit and let him hold you. The heat from the car won't be able to warm you up. Realize that even his body next to you and holding you won't even be able to do the trick, not today.

Have one of those conversations that can end in one of two ways.

1. Things get fixed. Some worries go away.

2. It just ends. Not just the conversation, but the whole wonderful dream that life has been the last few months, just over. 

Hope and Pray that it ends without a goodbye. 

After a few minutes of talking (or rather sitting in silence most the time and occasionally saying important things), say goodbye with an "I love you," and a kiss. 

Let him open the door to your car for you. Sit in it. Watch the rain fall on your front window. Hear the rain fall all around you and the wind hit your car. Watch him walk away in the rain. Wonder when you'll watch him walk away for the last time.

You still have him for now, but wonder when it will become too hard to keep it up. Wonder when he won't be able to handle your silly demands anymore

Wonder if one day you'll never have to say goodbye.

Start to drive home. Look in to your rear view mirror and watch him start to drive home as well. 

Realize that you have never loved anyone more.

Realize that nothing else matters. Whether he is sad or you are sad, know that happiness always follows sadness. Wait for the happiness.

Listen to the rain.

Wish for it to go away.

Wait for the sunshine. 

Wish for the happiness.