How to love unconditionally.

So I'm sitting on my bed and I'm yawning every few seconds and I'm distracted by facebook and I'm trying to decide what love is. 

See, there's examples everywhere. Like, the old couple holding hands as they walk across the street. Or the little "I love you" comments posted on facebook. Or the kisses you see secretly stolen in public places. Or when my dad gives me a blessing. Or when my mom listens to me talk for hours. Or when my sister does the dishes for me when I'm heart broken. Or when my brother stays home to help me put up a bookshelf. Or when my little brother tells me he missed me. Or the sweet hugs from small cousins. 

It's everywhere. So you'd think it would be easy to figure out just what exactly love is. 

Because everyone has a different view on it. 

"Love is speaking in code. It's an inside joke. Love is coming home." -The Format. 

I was talking to someone earlier about love. And he said he thought it was unconditional. 

And at first that seemed like a no duh type of description. Then I started to wonder if it was conditional. I mean, don't we all want unconditional love? Wouldn't that be fabulous to meet someone who would love you even if you gained 250 pounds and had a mental illness? It's what we want. It's security. But IS it unconditional? Really, you gotta question it. There's so many break ups and divorces and broken hearts in this world. If love was unconditional, would that be the case? 

Well I decided that true love is unconditional. But true love is not romantic love. 

See, romantic love dies. I hear it all the time, "They just fell out of love."

Being IN love is conditional. If I was in love and they cheated on me or something of that sort, I wouldn't be in love with them anymore. That would go away. However, I would love them still.

Because love doesn't die. 

I don't think love ever goes away. But it evolves. 

I'm looking back on my past relationships, or whatever you wanna call them, and I will honestly say I love all of those men. I'm not in the least bit in love with them, but I love them. And I don't think that goes away. It just grew in to something else. At one point, I was in love with them. Something changed that. And now I just love them. No romantic feelings attached. 

Now here I come to my second thought process. 

Do we love unconditionally? And if not, since I have decided love is unconditional, do we love at all? I mean, people get left all the time after years and years of love and commitment. If that love was unconditional, would either person leave?

So maybe we don't love at all. Maybe we just wish and pretend. 

But then I decided that sometimes love means leaving. 

Sometimes, the greatest showing of love is in the simple act of letting the other person live their life without you. 

Isn't that sad? 

Unconditional love is when my dad wakes up after a 20 hour work day just so he can give me a blessing when I'm crying or have gone on the wrong path. It's when my mom listens to me talk for hours even though she wants to watch her show. It's when my sister does dishes for me even though I steal her cd's all the time. It's when my older brother builds my bookshelf even though he thinks a "retarded monkey" could even set it up. It's when my little brother admits to having missed me when he was on vacation even though I yell at him all the time. It's when he showed me his scars and I still didn't run away. It's when he walked out that door for my own good despite loving me. It's when my friends took me back in even though I had left them. It's when we argue all the time but stick around anyway because we know we're better together. 

That's unconditional love. 

It's not made up of kisses and hugs and romantic dates. It's made up of the little things we do to protect each other. 

And that doesn't go away. 

So THATS what I think love is. 

"When I say I love you, it isn't just some emotion I have for you. It means our friendship is strong and I'm fighting for you. Emotions don't last long."